Because of the difficulties previous proxy teams had faced trying to deal with Silent Bob, this time we had the kill team keep radio contact throughout the mission, so that Ahriman could follow everything that was happening.

Even though Ahriman was the only one who needed to be listening, everyone in the apartment gathered around the radio to hear what was happening. Even Sky, though she kept back, and seemed too lost in her head to really pay attention to the words.

The reports coming in were standard protocol at first. Manton kept us updated on their current position as the team moved toward the target, until they reached where the target group was supposed to be. That’s where things went off the rails.

Manton: “No one is present at the target location. Fox’s investigation of the scene shows that they had camp here, but left quickly.”

Ahriman: “Can you follow their trail?”

M: “Affirmative.”

A: “Do so.”

M: “Roger. Manton out.”

*Several minutes passed before they reported back in.*

M: “Targets found. Dumas appears to be leading them out of the city.”

A: “Eliminate him.”

Those two words felt like a punch to the gut. Lepidus started to protest, but Ahriman glared him down.

I heard Dumas’ voice coming in faintly over the radio.

Dumas: “Hey guys, I know what this looks like, but there’s a good reason-”

*Gunshot*

M: “Damn, only hit the shoulder. Jenny, Ryan, and Kenny are running. Should we pursue?”

A: “No. Your target is Silent Bob. Focus on him.”

*Several more gunshots, as well as sounds of fighting. Heard a few screams, then quiet.*

M: “Fox and Valar have been incapacitated, but are still alive. Dumas and Silent Bob are running.”

A: “Continue pursuit. We will send a medical team to pick up Fox and Valar.”

*Several more minutes passed, with Manton giving reports on their position. We were able to follow them on the map at first, but after a while it got… really weird. The streets they were reporting to be on were all over the city. And then, a deafening roar of white noise came from the radio. Underneath it, I could barely hear Manton’s voice.*

M: “Um… sir… we’ve caught up with the two targets… as well as the other three… and…. The Slender Man’s here as well. What are our orders?”

*The Boss’s appearance on the scene seemed to surprise Ahriman for a moment, but he was quickly shouting orders back through the radio.*

A: “Father has given his blessing to your mission! Kill the target! Remove his blasphemous existence from this world!”

M: “Yes sir. But… um… sir, he’s… Silent Bob, he’s… laughing, sir.”

A: “So? I don’t care if he’s singing Disney musicals, your orders are to kill him!” *His words were confident, but his tone was unsure. Everything we’d heard about Silent Bob indicated he was supposed to be a lifeless, animalistic machine. Laughter was not in character for the person we’d been going after.*

*We heard a few gunshots, and then screams. Lots of screams. And over the whole thing, we could hear Bob laughing. He stopped laughing as all sounds of fighting ceased, and I heard a little girl’s voice.*

“Bob! Bob, stop it! Stop that! You’re being really, really scary!”

*A thud, and then I didn’t hear her anymore. The next voice I heard was Dumas, talking to Manton.*

D: “Manton, give me your gun.”

M: “Are you joking? I’m not going to give you my-”

D: “Just give me the damn gun before he kills everyone here! I’ll draw him away, you two run for it!”

*A few moments of silence.*

M: “Alright. Good luck.”

D: *Shouting at someone* “Hey! Bob! Count the shells, suck-a-duck!

*Gunshot, followed by the sounds of running.*

M: “Null, Larry, April, and Barbarossa are dead. Repeat, Null, Larry, April, and Barbarossa are dead. Nightgaunt and I are returning to base.”

A: “What?! You will complete your mission!”

M: “…. With all due respect, sir, if you want to kill that monster, you’re welcome to try yourself. Manton out.”



What just happened?